Bringing Your Creative Inspiration To Life

My wife, Elise stepped out in a big way this past year. She has always been an artist, but it has only been recently that she has chosen to share her beautiful pastel paintings on a larger scale.  Last year, she opened her first studio in downtown Raleigh, she built a new website, www.eliseokrend.com, which now includes limited edition prints of her paintings. Elise has been making her way as an artist, and her paintings are now being shown in a special two month exhibit at the Duke Raleigh Hospital.

The Duke Hospital exhibit is a wonderful opportunity, as I believe Elise’s art is healing, and the presence of  her paintings there help to nurture an environment of healing.

You might also know that  I have also been on a creative path with music, most recently creating meditative and relaxing compositions that I bring into my work as a Life Coach. I produced the CD, Emergence, A Meditative Journey Through The Seasons. I am working on new music that I feel is healing, and have recently written a new composition called “Footprints In Time.“©2010, Phil Okrend.

We hadn’t  thought about combining our two mediums of art and music before, but as I helped Elise put her art up at the Duke Hospital last week, an idea was born to combine our passions, Elise’s art with my music. This is the result of this idea, a video we call”Healing Art and Music“. You can hear the composition, “Footprints in Time” as you watch these beautiful pastel landscapes roll before you.

We hope that our creative efforts inspire you, and make sure you read about the Special Group Coaching Program starting in April to help you create passion and profit in your life.

Registration Starting Now! I have a few spots left in my group coaching program, “Living and Working For Passion and Profit” starting in April. This group program is designed to inspire you  to act on your own ideas and find ways to profit from them.  The world needs what you have to offer!

Act now if interested as this program will fill up. For details, and to register, go to http://www.steppingstonescoaching.com/workshop.html

Read about Elise’s exhibit at Duke Raleigh Hospital at http://www.visualartexchange.org/community_hospital.php

Phil’s CD, Emergence is available at CD Baby.com, http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/philokrend2

Life Lessons From Steve Jobs &Original Song/Video For Occupy Wall Street

The thing about intuition is that it can’t be tested going forward, but its rightness can be seen as you look backwards. I heard Steve Jobs commencement speech from Stanford on the radio yesterday, he said that when he dropped out of college, he finally took courses that he was interested in. He dropped in on a Calligraphy class and had no grand plan in taking it. He just loved it. He said, ” None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But 10 years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do.”

And so, as you move forward in your life, don’t worry about what it all means. If you are moved by something, feel passion, energy, do it, and don’t let your fears about practicality, safety stop you. If you trust, you will be guided and you will see the connections later on. There is a plan for you, just follow it, and let these greater feelings guide you. That is what life is about!

My 20 year old  old son Jordan, a wonderful guitarist/singer/songwriter wrote a song called “Anyhow” towards the beginning of this year. He was moved by some of the problems he was seeing in our world, especially with economic inequities, and he wrote words and music, just expressing himself. Then came the Arab Spring, and now with the Occupy Wall Street movements, his song is taking on a new purpose that he didn’t know at the time. He was merely following his feelings.  Here is the song, Anyhow by Jordan Okrend, with images of what we are seeing at this time.  Enjoy and if you like this song and video, please share with others. Hear more of Jordan’s music at reverbnation.com/jordanokrend.

Becoming The Observer

Would you like to experience greater peace of mind and less anxiety in your life? We all would and yet it seems so hard to do these days.  These may be some of the current challenges that you feel are stopping you from getting there.

Overwork

Not Enough Time

Constant Distractions

Relationship Challenges

Financial/Business/Work Challenges

Health Challenges

Home and technology challenges

World Events with the constant worry it fosters from natural disasters to the threat of terrorism.

Well this is just a partial list. You may have more to add to your own list, but in today’s increasingly complex world, you can’t expect things to change out there to make you feel better.  And what do you generally do when you feel stress coming on. Well many people simply react, and reaction can produce the following: Anger,frustration, fatigue, headaches, you get the picture.  What if there was another way, a better way to deal with these challenges?

There is a better way, and it is the Power Of Observation.  What if instead of getting triggered to react, you chose to stand outside a situation and simply observe it. What does this mean?  Well for example someone cuts you off in traffic and you are about to yell out some heated words for the other driver to hear. What if you watched yourself  as you are starting to do this.  As you choose to watch yourself, you automatically slow down as you see things from a bigger picture.  In the space of observation, you can then choose to ask yourself questions, questions that you would never ask if you are reacting. Its like standing outside on the banks watching the rapids instead of being caught up in the rapids.  Here are some questions you might ask as the observer:

If I continue to scream and yell, what will the likely outcome be? How will this set the mood for my day? How will my reaction affect the focus I need to accomplish the tasks I want to today?  How will getting angry affect my health?  If I get into an argument, what might that lead to? If I let this situation go, how can I start to feel better?

As the observer, you can become aware of the answers to these questions, and then have the power to choose a better way. Perhaps you decide that you just won’t take it personally, and drive by the other person’s car with a smile. By observing and then choosing, your emotions stop controlling you and you end up making better decisions, decisions that serve you.  Here are some of the benefits of being the observer:

1. Difficult Situations tend to dissipate on their own because you drop the emotional charge of defensiveness and reaction that keeps it going. Drama does not have a chance to perpetuate.

2. Creative solutions to problems have the space to emerge where they don’t in a reactive state.

3.  You have time to live according to your higher values which don’t exist in the reactive state.

4. You start to generate calmness in your life, and you feel healthier. Contrast that to the stress and negativity produced by the reactive state.

What other positive attributes do you think you would develop by becoming the observer of your experience as opposed to reacting to situations?

Lets face it. Reactivity just leads to more of the same and an original unpleasant situation will more than likely exacerbate from the reaction causing more struggle, more resistance, more unhappiness. As Carl Jung so famously said, “What You Resist Persists.”  Ultimately most reaction comes from fear, protection and conditioning while observing comes from authenticity, courage, wisdom.

So next time you find yourself in a situation not to your liking, take a breath, step back and observe. It may be the most empowering choice you decide to make.

You’ve Got My Attention

Early evening last May 14th, I was driving home after one of my son Jordan’s shows in downtown Raleigh.  As I was driving up Atlantic Avenue back to my home in North Raleigh, a car suddenly ran a red light in the intersection I was crossing and broad sided our small SUV causing it to turn over.  My wife, Elise was next to me and son Jordan was in the back seat.  In a flash the car had completely turned over and my right hand somehow got pinned under my car.  In what seems like a slow motion dream, the car was lifted from my hand, and an ambulance came and took me to Wake Med hospital. My head was also bleeding.  I underwent a Cat Scan which revealed no internal head injuries but two of my fingers had been broken as my hand was crushed.  I had surgery and pins were placed in the 2 fingers.  Elise sustained some injuries to her toes from glass as she was able to get out of the car after the impact.  Jordan was completely unhurt.  I have been going through physical rehab since that time, and today I had the pins removed from my fingers.  My prognosis for a full recovery of my right hand is excellent, and I should be back to form in a month or so.

First, I would like you to know how grateful I am to be alive and that my family was not hurt.  Someone had said that after they saw our vehicle, that it was a miracle we didn’t die or suffer more serious injuries.  Since the accident I have been forced to slow down, to learn to maneuver with my left hand which I am writing with now. It has been an exercise in developing patience and developing faith.  When you are forced to give up control, you learn to let go.  This is what I have been doing. I also realize that there is nothing to fear, God looked after me that night and got my attention.  I realize how important it is to live from love and faith. I love my family more than anything, and I am appreciating them and me.  There is a reason I am still here.  The coaching sessions with my clients have become richer and deeper, and my focus in helping my clients is growing stronger.  After a month of mostly resting and healing, I am ready to take on more clients, to partner  with them to achieve what is truly meaningful, purposeful, to live from contribution, success, fulfillment. I also want to share that the accidents, circumstances or unforseen events of our lives(even if we don’t like them) can be turned around and  transcended to produce more meaning, more joy, more connection with our  selves and others. I hope this post gets your attention if it needs to just as my accident got mine.

The Art Of Joy

I think that Joy is something we all yearn for, and yet in the very complicated world that we live in,with its demands and  distractions , a feeling of joy can feel elusive.  In this blog, I compare creating joy to an art form much like painting a picture, composing a piece of music, or preparing a delicious meal. Below is a recipe for joyful living. See how these 8 ingredients can make a difference for you in your life.

Here are the ingredients:

1. Intention: This is the foundation of joy. Set your intention every day, and if you do this you will not be taken over by old stories, habits and patterns.

2. Creation: You are a creator and joyful people take responsibility for creating their own lives.

3. Authenticity: Joyful people have an integrity around them. They do what is right even if there is social pressure to do otherwise. Joyful people are true to themselves and their values.

4. Alignment: When you are in alignment with your inner desires, you feel joy. When you are not aligned with your inner desires, you feel the opposite of joy.  Allow the contrast of being out of alignment guide you back, and make a new choice.

5. Flow: Let go of your resistance.  You don’t have to work so hard to get what you want. Set your intentions, do your best, but after that stay non attached to outcomes, accepting what is in your life, and in appreciation of the positive energy that you are feeling moment to moment, and always looking forward to the possibilities that can arise.  To activate flow, practice the following:

a. Express Gratitude.  Say and make your personal mantra, ” I am grateful for__________, (i.e. health, friends, pets, food, your loved ones, the spring, etc.)

b. Use phrases such as “I am in the process and my desires are unfolding” or “What I want is on its way.”

c.  Believe in possibilities. Say to yourself, “Lots can happen over the next week, over the next month, you never know what the tide can bring in.”

6. Autonomy: Joy requires autonomy.  If you focus on what other people want you to do, you will experience pain.  Practice catching yourself. Say, “I will never surrender my leadership.” It is none of my business what you think of me.”

7. Passion: If you have joy, you will find a way to pursue your passion.  Passion lights an internal flame so pursue your passion every day.

8. Purpose: Joy is purposeful.  It creates a ripple effect that lifts others,a nd is transformative. When you live from joy, you are making a difference and positively effecting the world around you.

See if practicing these 8 ingredients of joyful living can make a difference to you in your life. Your comments are welcome.

In gratitude,

Phil Okrend, CPCC, JD

Stepping Stones Coaching

The Art Of Elise Okrend at Artsposure, May 21-22nd, Raleigh, NC     I am proud to say that my wife, Elise Okrend is a person who embodies the concept of “The Art Of Joy.” She incorporates these principles as a wife and mother devoted to her family. That role gives her much joy, but she is also an artist who paints gorgeous landscapes that move the spirit, heal and inspire.  She is busy as a graphic designer and painter and is proud to have juried exhibits of her work. Elise is looking forward to two upcoming shows,Artsplosure in Raleigh’s historic Moore Square, May 21st to 22nd and Duke Hospital in Durham for the month of June. Elise looks forward to seeing you at Artsplosure in a few weeks, and will be featuring original framed paintings, and limited edition prints on display and for sale. You can explore Elise’s work at eliseokrend.com

The Power Of A Dream

Writing this blog on the birthday of  Martin Luther King, Jr., I am reminded that he had a dream, and in that dream of racial equality in America, it was probably not even comprehensible that one day the United States would have its first black president. But that is the power of a dream, if it is given breath and life.

So what is your dream? I want to share with you a video that I produced with my original music and voice called the Future Self Visualization.  If you are looking to clarify your dream, and to overcome doubt or fear that may be holding you back, watch this video and dream.  And as you go through this video, my hope for you is not just where you want to be in ten years but who do you want to be in ten years, who is the person you are capable of becoming.

In the spirirt of living and working from a dream, I wanted to let you know about an exciting program starting in a few weeks in Cary, NC.

The Spiritual Entrepreneur is a 5 week program that will inspire your vision for life and business, and move you into action to achieve your dreams. This live program starts February 1st at the BNC Center in Cary, NC and the cost is just $50 for 5 two hour workshops. Only 5 spots left for this program that will change the way you look at your life and business. Sign up now!

Click on The Spiritual Entrepreneur to view the course outline  and to register!

I offer 30 minute complimentary coaching consultations so you can see how the coaching process can move you forward powerfully in your life and business. Please sign up by sending an e mail to phil@steppingstonescoaching.com

A Happy Summer

I hope your summer has been great!  I had a wonderful summer traveling, spending time with my family. I especially relished my role in helping my son Jordan produce and promote his music, bringing his creative passions to life. (See details below on an upcoming workshop series designed to help you profit from your creative passions, starting Sept. 7th)

Jordan’s debut EP, “Unpredictable” was recorded and released this summer, and it has received wonderful reviews, http://www.reverbnation.com/jordanokrend. My wife Elise, a gifted artist in her own right designed the cover of the EP shown below, which won an award for design excellence, http://www.eliseokrend.com. It was truly a labor of love and an achievement for our family.

Another highlight this summer was Jordan trying out at the American Idol auditions in New Jersey. He came very close to advancing to the next round, and there is always next year.  Jordan played lots of shows this summer and made a good income from it. He just returned for his second year at Appalachian State University in the music industries program where he will continue to refine his skills and knowledge of the music industry, while continuing to perform and make music.

I am pleased to share a video Jordan made recalling his summer experiences called “A Happy Summer.” The video features his original song, “You Make Me Happy”  which was inspired by a magical place called Hebron in the Western North Carolina mountains. Hope you enjoy.

Jordan’s EP “Unpredictable” including the song “You Make Me Happy” is now available on ITUNES

So what is your creative passion and what is your desire to bring your creative dreams to life, and to profit from them?

If this question speaks to you, then you need to know about a great Workshop Series starting September 7th in Raleigh co-presented by myself and writer, Alice Osborn. And if you register before September 1st, you will save $100 off the cost of the program:

Register Now!

Profiting From Your Creative Passion Workshop Series with Phil Okrend and Alice Osborn

This is the time to revitalize the creative dreams you’ve once had and this is the time to make your creative visions real. This workshop series is especially designed for the individual who has creative talents in the visual, performance, recording or the literary arts and who wants to take their talents to the next level and get paid for their efforts. During this workshop series you will be guided by Certified Life coach Phil Okrend and Writer Alice Osborn who will tweak your mindset and give you the permission to believe in yourself and your gifts.

Hurry! This great workshop series begin on Tuesday, September 7th, and the early bird special pricing ends on September 1st. Click Here to Register today!

Take The Blue Pill Or The Red Pill Or What Motivates You?

Take the Blue Pill Or The Red Pill.

The movie, The Matrix presented the pill choosing scenario when choosing between two different paths in life.  I’d like to use this metaphor for some thoughts on motivation.

There is a big difference in what drives people to want to accomplish goals, make changes and achieve success in their life. I believe that one way can lead you to a life filled with contentment, appreciation and positive energy while the other is often filled with reactivity, endless striving and a sense of unease.

It all comes down to asking a fundamental question. If there is something important that you want to do or achieve in your life, what makes you want to do or achieve it?

Many people are driven by an external response to the circumstances, things or people in their lives. There are quite a few stories out there about people who spend their life chasing after wealth, power or fame because they had something to prove. Something to prove to their parents, their friends, whoever they may be and for different reasons. Other people pursue goals and success in order to meet the expectations of others or from not wanting to disappoint others.

Whether people pursue their life goals from having to prove something or trying to gain acceptance or approval from others, their pursuit is driven by an outside source that rarely brings peace of mind or happiness. Although outer success can be achieved this way, it often comes at the cost of true joy and authenticity. Self worth does not need to be proven or obtained. The restless pursuit of it is causing many people to be burned out, stressed out and depleted.

The accomplishment of goals and success can be so much sweeter if motivated from one’s own values and belief in self. This kind of motivation is derived internally and is filled with trust, possibility and seeing how your talents and passions can be realized to serve you and others in the world. Success in the form of money or wealth often comes this way, and it is a by- product of positive energy flowing from the inside-out.

So which pill will you take when deciding what to go for in life, the Blue Pill(External Response) or the Red Pill(Internal Belief)?

If you are ready to make positive change in your life and achieve an authentic success in your life, here is information about a special workshop coming in May in Raleigh  that you won’t want to miss!

Discover Your True Calling Through Writing & Coaching With Alice Osborn and Phil Okrend

Date: Tues. May 11th from 7-9pm

Cost: $30

Register Here: http://budurl.com/findyourcalling

Location: Calm and Sense in Glenwood Village, 2603-111 Glenwood Ave, Raleigh, NC

In this workshop, writer Alice Osborn and lifecoach Phil Okrend will inspire you to find your passion and your calling through meditation, music, writing and guided visualization.

Hope to see you There!

What Is Your Purple Cow?

If you were driving down a road and saw a purple cow in a field, would you stop to take a look?  Most likely you would, as spotting a purple cow would be pretty rare and unique. In fact, you would probably not notice most of the other cows grazing in the field, as you would be fixated on the purple cow.  So how does this apply to a business or service you might be offering.  To be a purple cow makes you stand out, and if you have a business or service to offer,  potential customers and clients would take notice, and if you are looking for a job, being a purple cow would cause potential employers to take another look.

What is your purple cow? I assure you that you possess something, a talent or passion that is unique to you, and it is your job to bring it out, and to not be afraid to let others know what it is. It can be the very thing that makes the difference for you in the outcome you want to achieve. As a coach, my job is to help my clients shine and to bring out their passions and talents, and to overcome the limiting beliefs that hold them back.

I am pleased to be offering my next group coaching program, Living and Working For Passion and Profit starting in mid April.  This series of 4 group sessions will take you through a process to help you bring out your own purple cow with visualization, brainstorming, action planning and accountability to achieve what is most important to you in your life and business. For description and details about the program, go to http://www.steppingstonescoaching.com/workshop.html

By the way, “The Purple Cow” is a wonderful book written by Seth Godin.

Groundhog Day

Groundhog Day seems like an insignificant holiday on its surface.  But there is a meaning to this day that can remind us that hope, optimism and life exist even amidst a time of deadness or slow growth.  As the folklore goes, every year on February 2nd, the groundhog emerges from its burrow to see whether winter will soon end.  When the groundhog peaks out of its hole and sees its shadow, it runs back below, and the winter continues on for 6 more weeks.

Like the groundhog, we want and need reminding of nature’s ability to bring forth life again.  And indeed, there is a knowing when we look inside, that despite all the challenges or heartache that life throws at us, there will always be a time of spring and renewal.  As long as we believe that spring will come to us, it will.  Groundhog Day reminds us to look ahead, and to look for the signs of growth in our own lives.